I hate tow truck drivers

I mean I really hate them. Tonight was an excellent example of why. The Mrs. and I were on our way to the movies. We were just driving along. Traffic was kind of crappy due to the Houston Texans game down the road. It was pretty snarled as thousands of people tried to exit the same exit from 610. Well, as we are inching along to try to get onto the entrance ramp, we have to cross this traffic coming off of the exit ramp. A tow truck that was behind me decides that he should jump in front of me. Does he use a trun signal? Nooooo. He jerks his truck repeatedly toward me, trying to get me to slam on the brakes, so that he can jump ahead. Being the stubborn asshole who believes that this behavior is incredibly rude, refuses to yield the right of way, and does not let him in. He finally figures it out, and gets in line behind me, cutting in front of the car that was behind me at first. Is it over? Nooooo. Next, this jerkoff wants to get even. So, he decides to gun it past me when it's possible to get into the entrance ramp. I decide that I better stop before I run into him because it is less clear who would has the right of way. So this asshole shoots in front of me. So, now that he has had his little revenge, does he just carry on his merry little way? Noooo. Once he is in front of me, he just stops, trying to piss me off. Note to anyone who likes to pull a stunt like this: you are a sitting duck for a bullet to the back of the head from someone with less control and less to lose than I. Anyway, I see what he is doing, and swing the tires to the right, like I am going to go around him. Just as I expected, he waits until that point to pull ahead, in the hopes of me missing the entrance ramp. It doesn't work. I get behind him, and he takes off at 80+ mph.

At this point I am really ramped up. I consider, briefly, falling back in order to fool him into thinking that he has lost me, and then tail him to his destination with the intent of really fucking up him or his truck after he stops. I pretty quickly dismiss it because; A) my wife is with me, B) I have nothing to gain, C) I have a lot to lose if things go badly, and D) I have better things to do with my time than track down a tow truck driver, and then run his ass over when he steps out of his truck..... Okay, maybe D isn't true. I decide instead to just call the cops and to make a report. I know that the cops are getting kickbacks from the tow truck drivers, and that nothing will happen. That is a failing on their part, not mine.

Tow truck drivers are the dregs of human society. When I worked on an ambulance, they would ignore all the rules of the road in order to get to a vehicle accident, further endangering the public. I remember there being a 4:1 tow truck to wreck ratio at accident scenes; 4 trucks= single car accident, 8 trucks = 2 car accident, and so on. When I was in college, one of them tried to run over a friend of mine, and the cops threatened to arrest my friend when he tried to file a report. These assholes think that they have some sort of divine right to behave as they will on the roads, and the police encourage it by letting them get away with it. If someone ever beats a tow truck driver to death right in front of my eyes, I will not likely do a thing to stop them, and will probably hold off on calling the cops until the guy is finished. I will also probably get a sudden, unexplainable case of selective amnesia when the cops ask about what I witnessed. If I see someone slash the tires on a tow truck, I will say nothing, and only give them a "two thumbs up."

In closing, I would like to say to that tow truck driver tonight: Fuck You. Go fuck yourself, you cock-sucking little bitch. Unlike you, I have a hot wife, and don't need to get laid by utilizing the services of a cheap whore, who is probably giving you a family discount (you can thank your mother for that). I also have a future where I will make the kind of money that I can drive the cars you only get to drool about towing. Most of all, I have the one thing that will forever escape you; Respect. Enjoy your life whatever it is you can honestly call it.

....loser.

Respectfully Submitted,

doc Russia